"We no longer have a hemorrhoid problem." ... We didn't need to know that there was one."

It's been awhile since I've posted.  There is a lot to catch you up on.  The most important of which is that I am DONEEEE with grad school!  And have since started my new real-person job doing research for the University as a Research and Development Engineer.  It has some security requirements that doesn't let me post details, but if you ever want to talk let me know :-).  There are some interesting things that I do that I can talk about.  I just, you know, shouldn't be boasting all over the internet about it.  So yeah.  But so far it's great.  I get to leave work at 5pm!  AND I have no homework!

The biggest thing that's been on my mind lately has been my relationshipped friends, again.  A few years ago (almost 3...oh dear), I wrote this post:    http://mollmoll22.blogspot.com/2010/01/frustration.html.  And then, when friends ultimately got their feelings hurt, I wrote this apology post: http://mollmoll22.blogspot.com/2010/01/apology.html.  I am going to try my best NOT to offend most of my relationshipped friends with this one, but it's a part of my life that's becoming obvious again, and there are things that I need to work on in myself as well.  So bear with me.  And also, please comment back at me to give me constructive criticism.  If you have seen these attributes in me, then tell me please.  I want to change for the better.  All in all though, I try very specifically not to exhibit behavior that I describe below.

The original post was written when I was a single person.  And honestly, I think most of my sentiments came from jealousy and selfishness about not having someone to similarly spend all of my time with.  "All of my friends spend ALL of their time with their boyfriends/girlfriends" I complained, assuming that at some point I would have an opportunity to spend all of my time with someone else.  It was rather childish and mostly naive, but the point still remains: many people in relationships simply don't know how to (or don't CARE to) spend time with other people.  And make their own decisions.  They simply don't.    

Today I am writing, not as a bitter single person whose friends all abandoned her for their significant others, but as a person in a rather happy (and I hope, healthy) relationship.  And I agree, that it takes significant effort on the part of the relationshipped person to make time for the other people in their lives.  Sure, you love him/her.  That's great.  And that means you want to spend all of your time with him/her.  But that habit will do nothing but ENSURE that you will at some point have no other friends.  That's just the way it is.

Let's start with an example scenario, one that I have experienced many many times from almost all of my friends in relationships at least once:
Me: Do you want to go see this chick-flick on Friday night?
Other person: I don't know.  Let me check with Boo-boo bear (or whatever you call him/her).

Okay.  Here's the deal.  If, at this point, you haven't made plans with your significant other for Friday night, then you are well and free to do with it as you please (other than, you know, promiscuous sex with other people...that's still a no-no).  Seeing a movie with your same-sexed friends is perfectly acceptable.  And now that I am in a relationship, I know EXACTLY how the other conversation will go when you talk to your significant other the following day.  

Other person: Hey, Molly invited me to go to the movies on Friday night.  Do you think we will be doing anything else?
Significant other: Well, I was thinking we could do (insert typical date night here).
Other person: Okay, I'll tell Molly that we have plans and I can't go see the movie with her.

Here's the kicker: YOU DON'T HAVE PLANS.  You made plans (sort of), AFTER she invited you to do something.  You simply don't want to hang out with Molly and would rather hang out with boyfriend/girlfriend, simple as that.

Now, if I invite you to do something and you do, in fact, already have plans, that's fine.  Say no.  But tell me, "So-and-so and I are going to go help feed the hungry that night, I'm sorry.  But can we do it another night?"

That sentence, above, tells me you care about me.  You have actually already made plans, and you are trying to reschedule.  

Or I guess a third option is that you really just don't want to see that movie.  But tell me the truth...don't use your boyfriend as an excuse for not hanging out.  

Also, it's okay to say the above sentence to your significant other.  For example, say yes to my invite to the movie BEFORE TALKING TO HIM/HER (I know, crazy!!!).  And then, later in the day when he suggests some romantic date night for the same time, simply ask him to move it to Saturday.  It really is quite simple.  He's not going to break up with you because you made other plans.  And if he is, he's kind of a crappy boyfriend.

I have spent two years purposefully making sure that I am not the person in the first scenario.  Now, I have done it (more in the beginnings of the relationship when things were new and exciting and I just wanted to see him ALL THE FREAKING TIME), but I don't make a habit of it.  I understand that the natural instinct is to want to blow off all of your friends.  I get it, I really really do...I have been/am there.  And it takes CONSIDERABLE EFFORT not to do this.  But if I matter to you, you should make time for me, too.  Otherwise, you'll lose me.

I've been watching How I Met Your Mother a lot recently (Netflix...yay!).  I was able to find a paraphrase of part of an episode that applies to this post.  Sorry, I couldn't find the youtube equivalent.  I will leave you with this scenario:  

"As he's preparing to leave, Ted is so hopped up on Tantrum that he rips up a throw pillow on purpose, then shouts, "TANTRUM!" He then tells Barney how thrilled he is to have some alone time with Marshall, because Marshall and Lily have started morphing into a "we." Any question he asks Marshall (how are you doing; did you watch the game) gets a we answer -- even when Marshall's just back from the doctor. "We no longer have a hemorrhoid problem." We didn't need to know that there was one." (http://www.televisionwithoutpity.com/show/how_i_met_your_mother/duel_citizenship_1.php?page=2)

As cute as Marshall and Lily are as a couple (and in the rest of the episodes, not that much like the above description), don't emulate the above scenario.  Just don't.  You're your own person.  The two of you should complement each other, not BE each other.  Make your own decisions, have your own hobbies/interests/friends.  You can also do couply things and have couply friends, but variety is what makes life interesting and fun.  

My favorite couples have been the ones that have included me in their lives.  The ones where I can hang out with the two of them and not feel like a third wheel.  The ones that spend time apart every once in awhile.  The ones that make jokes and laugh with one another (and sometimes laugh AT one another).  The ones who have differing interests and hobbies, and even different political views.  Conversations with couples like that are varied and wonderful.  And don't make me want to vomit when they get all mushy.  

Like this couple: 

Or this one: 

Or this one: 

The fact that I have pictures of you as a couple means you let me hang out with you.  And we had enough fun to take pictures.  So there.  :-).  

Is it a problem in myself, too?  Sure.  Why do the actions of my friends bother me so much?  It's something I need to work on.  Because I get downright ANGRY when I see this behavior in any of my friends.  And I see it in SO MANY of my friends (thus, the post today).  Is the fact that I get angry about this a testament to my character?  Sure.  I need to chill on this topic, I think.  Deep breaths and prayer, to be sure.  But poor treatment of people is something that always riles me up, and this type of behavior does affect those around you.  So if you're one of these couples, start to think of how your actions are hurting others.  And also tell me if I am being outright mean to you because of it.  I should be nice, and I'm sorry.  

Anyway, if you suspect that I am blowing you off just so I can have another few hours to hang out with the boyfriend I see every day anyway, or if I am morphing into a "we" instead of an "I", please tell me.  And also slap me in the face.  That is all.  

So close so close.

I have to submit my thesis online before Friday.  Good times.  I am so close.  It's basically been done for a month now, I am just playing around with a few last minute formatting blips.  Right now Word won't let me number the pages the way I want to, and it's ANNOYING.  GAHHHH.  This is totally not something that I should be dealing with right now. 

Also, I started my new, real-person job last week.  Stories to come soon!  

Anyway, I apologize for the lack of posts the past month or so, and I promise to begin again shortly :-). 

Last weekend?

With any luck, this is the last weekend I will be working.  I am supposed to hand in my thesis on Tuesday to adviser so she can read the whole thing together (for the first time).  On Wednesday I fly in an aeroplaneeee to go to California for my cousin's wedding! And hopefully I don't return with a crap-ton of work to do on my thesis.  I just want to get back from my trip and SLEEP for DAYS. 

*crosses fingers*

I really just want to be done.  I am so over school.  And thesis writing.  And this whole working on the weekends without getting paid thing.  I just want to enjoy my LIFE.  You know?  That part of me that doesn't involve work?  My work, while definitely a part of who I am, is not WHO I am. 

It's beginning to look a lot like...fall!

A beautiful tree on my walk into work this morning.  Colors shamelessly enhanced by Instagram. 

Fall has always been my favorite season, and October my favorite month.  It's beautiful, crisp, and there's nothing I love more than hot apple cider and pumpkin flavored EVERYTHING!  

It's rather unfortunate that this year it is coupled with a huge sense of anxiety.  The first day of October sent a wave of terror across my entire existence.  Thesis is due to my sponsors and faculty reader in 2 weeks, if I'm going to get this done on time for the mid-November final deadline.  In a month I will start my new job, and new jobs are always scary.  Plus I am flying on an airplane in 2 weeks to go to my cousin's wedding in CA, which tends to stress me out.  I am spending all of my time inside working, but I just want to go outside and play!  

Ironic, that about this time last year, I was remarking on how I would no longer associate fall with the start of classes and it would be that much better this year!  Oops.  Next fall.  Next fall I won't have classes AND I won't be finishing a master's thesis.  

But in the meantime, I am enjoying the fall leaves.  Penn State is beautiful this time of year.  :-). 

Lantern Tours

Last night, boyfriend and I went on a "Lantern Tour."  Going into it, the only thing we knew was from a flyer that I saw that said you would "Meet the characters from Penn State's past and present during a stroll through campus by Lantern Light" and "Free refreshments."  I like lanterns, Penn State, history, and free food, so I convinced boy that this would be fun to do (he was less convinced, but he humored my enthusiasm).  

Oh man.  It.  Was.  Awesome.  It was a beautiful night in Happy Valley, approximately 65° and clear skies.  We showed up at Old Main at about 7:30, and signed up for a tour.  We had to wait about half an hour, but in the meantime we ate some of those free refreshments, watched some people juggle light-up balls, and listened to an A Capella group sing pretty songs.  Then we got called for our tour.  Our group was lead by two students, one of which was wearing a fake mustache.  We then started the walk around campus.  Intermittently, there were characters dressed in elaborate costumes who told us about things from the past.  We met George Atherton, one of the first presidents of the University, and his wife who was a ghost.  We met some military-dressed "students" from the past and learned about the beginnings of the ROTC.  We met Ben and Jerry.  We met a young Sue Paterno, who, in an effort to encourage school spirit in the 1970's, lead a group of other coaches' wives to paint the Lion Shrine ORANGE (so the students would think the opponents did it and rally behind their team, or something), accidentally using latex-based paint instead of water-based paint.  And we went to the top of the Old Main bell tower and gazed upon campus at night (which was TOTALLY unexpected!).  I also got to see my friend Maria who was in our tour group, another unexpected surprise.  

Afterwards they didn't really herd us out of Old Main very quickly, so we dawdled and took some pictures with all the pretty things in the main lobby.  

We were THIS CLOSE to the clock!

Picking the lamb's nose

Giving Pugh a wet willie

Being thoughtful in Old Main

Office of the President

Playing with the Lion

 
So.  I got to eat ice cream, drink cider, walk around campus on a beautiful night, learn about Penn State's history, and go to the top of the bell tower.  :-)

Grad School Fodder

It's Saturday.  I shouldn't be working.  But I am.  And I will be tomorrow. I CANNOT WAIT to graduate.  With any luck, I'll be done within the month.  But probably not, the way this is going.  I want my weekends baaaaack.  It's fall, I should be drinking apple cider and playing in the leaves and watching football.   
I don't have this feeling often.  The feeling where I think I will just never be good enough.  Seriously, I spent the better part of 3 weeks pruning my data, inspecting it, learning from it, and then writing [what I thought was] the best thesis chapter in the world.  My figures were colorful and beautiful.  My words were concise and technical.

But.  It's still not good enough.  I need to write it again.  My adviser thinks my figures are sloppy and inconsistent (I disagree...it's true that my contour plot has a different range of data than my scatter plot, but guess what?  THEY ARE ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PLOTS, SHOWING ENTIRELY DIFFERENT DATA!!!), and my writing was not precise enough (my focus was wrong?  for the entire chapter?  perfect.).  So again, I write.  The same chapter over again.  This time with better plots and more precise word choice.  Not to mention the fact that I need to write an entire paper in the next 2 weeks on top of this thesis thing. 

Seriously, most of my friends who graduated wrote their entire thesis in like, a month, and their adviser skimmed it once...maybe twice.  I mean, come on.  Can I have that?  I've been fine up to this point, working longer hours than many of my grad school friends didn't really matter to me because I liked what I did and I (surprisingly) was able to keep up with expectations.  And for the most part I stayed away from work on the weekends.  I was praised for what I did because I did it well.  But I am suddenly failing.  I can't write to her expectations.  I went from feeling like the Superstar! to Grad School is Hell in a matter of a few weeks. 

Which brings me to how surprised I am that I am so hurt by this.  Should my feelings depend on what other people think of me?  About whether or not I am living up to my adviser's expectations?  No.  They most certainly shouldn't.  But I was happy when she praised me and am now upset when she criticizes my figures (they were SO BEAUTIFUL!). 

The lesson to be learned is that my worth should not be put on any one person's perception of me.  My worth comes only from Christ.  Funny, that I remember telling a friend this when he was struggling with the same thing, with the same adviser, a little less than 2 years ago.  It pushed him far enough to quit.  I can't quit now.  And I won't.  But gosh darn it, I want to do something right!  Can we fast forward to December, when I will have a new job?  Or rewind to April, when I used to be good at what I did? 

Writer's block

Have you ever had writer's block?  If you're not a writer, then probably not.  I never really had either.  I mean, for awhile in high school, I would have to write something new every week or so, and it wasn't a huge deal to me.  Sure, I got stuck sometimes, but that was nothing that a trip to dance class and back couldn't cure. 

While I enjoyed writing in high school, I never gave my life over to it.  I decided to become an engineer.  That writing was too subjective of a subject to study.  I like concrete answers, for things to be black-and-white, for there to be a "true" answer to a problem or idea.  Plus, I didn't see any career in writing.  I mean, what do you do with a writing degree?  Just write more?  Teach other people how to write?  The job market seemed slim in that category.  And I didn't like writing THAT much.  I like math much better.

In undergrad I wrote a few things, lab reports, proposals, homework word problems, essay responses to Dr. Roth's material science exams, etc.  They were fairly cut and dry, and required little creativity.  I was fine with that.  If I wanted to get my creative juices flowing, I would go around campus and take some pictures, choreograph a dance, or write a blog post.  Even engineering required a certain amount of creativity, since there is more than one way to solve almost any problem.

And now, I have to write this thesis.  A master's thesis.  And I can't graduate until I do.  And I spend hours, days, looking at the screen trying to think of what to write.  Sad, huh?  I mean, I did all the research!  I can crank out technical drawings and figures in a matter of minutes.  But writing about those technical figures and drawings?  It's the most difficult thing I've ever done in my life.  Severe writer's block.  For like, the past month. 

So I figured, that maybe, by writing this blog post, I would get in the swing of writing again.  I have approximately a month left before that day where, if I'm not finished, I will have to wait another semester to get that degree.  And that's a problem.  You see, I have this job offer.  And this job offer is contingent on me receiving that degree.  And they already expected me to get that degree in August.  Now I have pushed it back to December.  They're flexible, but I don't really want to have to break it to them that I won't get a degree until May.  Plus, who wants to say they graduated in 2013??  Ick.  2012 is just so much better.

In other news, here are some pictures from last weekend.  We went on a boat, it was fun.  The lake we played on was a full hour drive from here, but it was totally worth it.

 

Sicky and Procrastination

I haven't posted in forever.  Mostly because it's summer, and any time I have I want to spend outside, with other people.  By the time I leave work for the day, I am really sick of sitting in front of the computer.  

I'm posting now mostly out of procrastination.  You see, on Tuesday night, I started to feel like I was getting sick.  And then on Wednesday through still today (Sunday), I have basically felt awful.  I didn't go to work on Wednesday or half of Thursday.  I probably shouldn't have gone to work on Friday, because on Saturday I was so exhausted I took a 2-hour nap.  And right now, I ALMOST feel better.  The only symptoms I have left from my fever/headache/sore throat/swollen sinuses/congestion/cough illness is the sore throat, more of a cough, and a teeny teeny headache.  The doctor said it probably wouldn't completely go away for 7 days.  That's Wednesday.  Ick.  

So I should be catching up on all the work I missed this week, right?  I mean, the only real work I have to do now is to write a thesis and a conference paper BEFORE October 17th.  2 months to do a thesis and a paper.  That's it.  That is 100% of my responsibilities.  But yet, I can't pull myself to work on it right now.  Church doesn't start for an entire 2.5 hours, so I can get a super big start on it.  But instead, I'm blogging.  I am never going to graduate.  

Sorry for the complaint-type post.  Just figured I'd keep you updated on what is ailing me most.  And right now it's worrying about getting everything done in time for graduation :-).  And being sick thwarted those plans this week.  I was going to do edits on an entire chapter this week, and have them ready by tomorrow! That is not going to happen.  

BUT when I graduate, I won't feel bad about not having worked on a Saturday.  BEST THING EVER.  I am so ready to be done with everything school related.  SO.  READY.  

New discoveries

I've been in State College long enough that most of the things I do now are repeats of things I have already done.  Not that they're not great things, I super love walking to the creamery on a summer night to eat ice cream while watching the sun set over the mountains.  Favorite.  But, I've done it.  It's always so exciting to find something new.  

On Sunday night, boy and I were on our way to the creamery when he suggested instead going to the top of a parking garage to see the sunset.  I was game.  And we went.  And it was beautiful.  Best view in State College.  And best view OF State College.  It's nice to be in a town where the tallest buildings are parking garages. 

Also tonight, we drove 20 minutes out of town to a winery that had an event with one of my coworkers and her boyfriend.  We tried some wine, bought a bottle and a platter of cheese, and sat outside on a blanket next to a campfire with a bunch of strangers, with a guy in the background playing songs on his guitar.  I felt like such an adult, sipping my wine and eating my cheese, talking about the hydrogen turbine.  And I got a free wine glass (...sort of, I paid a cover to get into the event)!  And I still smell like campfire.  Mmmmmm.  :-)  

Those are just a few of the new things I've discovered in my town just this week!  I am excited for many more to come this summer. 

Some pictures!

I took about 200 pictures in Copenhagen.  All of the good ones are on facebook.  Since a lot of you got rid of it (lameeeeeeee since it makes it so hard to share my pictures with you!), I'll post a few here :-).  But not very many since the photo uploading thingy on here is clumsy and slow.  If I'm going to make this more of a photo blog, I'm going to need to look more into switching venues.  But anyway, that's for another day.  Also, I plan on posting more specifically about the trip later this week, when I'm all caught up with work and sleep and whatnot.  For now, here are some of my favorite pictures! 

After 20 hours of travel and no sleep, we went into town and found some Danish beer!  And also food.  But I didn't take a picture of that.  Check out the little candle on our table!   

Pretty fountain.  This is really a beautiful city. 

Canals in the city. 

My lab group.  We got to travel together and bond over discovering Copenhagen and gas turbine engines and stuff. 

One of the perks of being a woman in engineering?  They feel bad about all the past discrimination and send you to a palace for dinner on one of the conference nights! 

There was an unbelievable number of bikes.  Such a bike friendly town!  It made me wish I had brought mine. 

At Tivoli Gardens...2nd oldest amusement park in the world, and is said to have given Walt Disney the inspiration for Disney World.  Such a cool place.  And there's a bird flying through the picture! 

Orange juice.  But in Danish, the word for "orange juice" is "appelsinjuice".  Not confusing at all. 

The Little Mermaid statue from behind.  I saw her from a boat, so I didn't see any more of her or her tail or anything.  Which is probably good, since it kept this picture G-rated. 

Copenhagen

Today I leave for Copenhagen!  Although I won't get there until tomorrow.  We are driving 5 hours to JFK airport, and then flying to Iceland (6 hours) before boarding our plane to Copenhagen (3 hours).  We will get on the road at 11:30am Saturday, and will arrive at 6:45am Sunday (except with the time change, it will be 12:45pm local time).  Lots of travel, but I've had longer travel days.  Hopefully we don't miss a flight or there's a blizzard or something silly like that. 

Pray for safe travels.  I'm not going to write my obligatory "I hate flying" post.  Because I do it way more often than is necessary.  I'm hoping to take some Nyquil and SLEEP the whole 6-hour flight from JFK to Iceland, anyway.  And it's only the first flight that frightens me.  By the time I board the 2nd-4th ones, I'll be used to it :-). 

Here's one last picture of Copenhagen before I get there.  Hopefully the next post will have my own pictures!  With my new awesome camera! 

Source: http://www.nytimes.com/2007/04/22/travel/22copenhagenweb.html?_r=1

Memorial Day Shenanigans

Memorial Day weekend was a blast.  I took advantage of the fact that my adviser was out of town, and also decided that since I worked Memorial Day and Labor Day last year, that I would not work Memorial Day this year. So I didn't.  And apparently, neither did anybody else in my lab.  So that was good. 

It started with my dad sending me a text about 2 weeks prior that read something along the lines of, "You're coming to the Bay House for your Mother's surprise party, right?"  Um.  Dad.  I think you forgot to invite me to the surprise party.  But whatever, I rolled with it and decided that, since it was a 3-day weekend, I didn't mind making the 5.5 hour drive up north to celebrate my Momma's 50th birthday.  On my next birthday, I will be half her age :-).  Which means that she was my age when I was born.  But we won't get into that.  

For those who aren't familiar with my family history, the "Bay House" is a really old house on the Sandusky Bay in Ohio that my grandparents own.  We went there a lot for vacation when I was a kid with the family of my mom's best high school friend, who has 4 girls that are about the same ages as me and my sisters (of course the 9 of us became the best of friends growing up together, and terrorized our fathers who were 2 men surrounded by 11 women in that house).  Most summers we would spend at least a week there.  It was the first place that introduced me to Lake Erie (since I wouldn't move to Erie until I was 12, and I was coming to the Bay House since I was born).  The backyard is the waterfront, and you can see Cedar Point across the bay.  Lots of my favorite childhood memories took place in this house, it's a wonderful place. It's also yellow. 

It was great to see family and friends.  Audrey was off of her crutches (yay!), and I got to see all the cousins/aunts/uncles that were in town (and some that came from really far away! Aunt Lisa came in from San Francisco.  Talk about dedication).  Also, 3 of the 4 girls that would play with my sisters and I during our Bay House summer visits were there, so we got to see them!  The one that was missing (the oldest...the one that's just barely older than me) lives in Colorado with her husband and teaches Preschool.  

Other than surprising my Momma, my favorite part was that I got to see my childhood best friend, Erica.  We were inseparable between 1994 and 1999, Erica and I were.  And after I moved to Erie, we wrote each other almost every week for years and visited each other about every six months through the beginning of high school.  I last saw her at her wedding 2 years ago, and before that it had been a really long time since we had seen each other.  So much fun to catch up! Also I got to actually have some conversations with her husband (hard to catch them on the wedding day...), and he's a really cool guy.  We also made tentative plans for future summer visits, so hopefully that will pan out!  It's amazing that we still have so much in common even 13 years after I moved away. 

 

Another highlight of the trip was paying a Memorial Day weekend visit to the graves of my grandparents, both of whom served in the Army/Marines in WWII/Korea, respectively.  This was the first time since their funerals in 2009 and 2010 that I had been out to see them.  That was pretty sweet. 

Here's one last picture.  Aren't my sisters getting so big?  Weird, since I remember when they were BORN.  

Getting caught in the rain

Tonight, boy and I walked to Chipotle for dinner.  It's probably about a mile walk from his apartment and from where I work.  We ate dinner and it was delicious -- I am quite addicted to Chipotle.  We noted that the sky looked scary, but decided to start the walk back home after dinner.  We made it about a block before the sky opened up and started pouring.  The wind was blowing sideways, the streets were filling up with water (so were my shoes), and we had no umbrella to keep us dry (although I was wearing a rain coat, which worked for a little while but eventually the hood blew off and water got inside).  We kept walking faster and faster, while laughing all the way about the complete ridiculousness of it.  It's surprisingly hard to see when it's raining that hard.  I'm really glad we didn't get hit by a car.  We kind of looked and felt like this:

The photo is not mine, it is from the movie, "The Notebook." And no, we did not find it romantic enough to share a passionate kiss that directly follows this scene. Mostly because we were trying to make it back alive. 

We should have done this:  

Needless to say, we were completely drenched by the time we made it back to his apartment, we might as well had gone swimming with our clothes on.  And the streets around his apartment were complete rivers, it was insane!  We spent the rest of the night watching the storm from his front porch. 

It was lots of fun.  

There's just something about getting caught in the rain that's freeing -- like you've surrendered.  At some point we had to make the decision to either stop walking and duck under something that could protect us, or surrender to the fact that we're going to get wet and keep walking.  Once we had given up on all hope of making it back with any inch of us dry, I was free to jump in all the puddles I wanted!  It's better that way: there are some things in life that you have to surrender to in order to keep moving forward.  I usually am trying to figure out what it is that God wants me to surrender to Him.  Usually the answer: everything. 

Anyways, I'm sad that I didn't take any pictures of the rain to share (even if I had my camera on that trip, it would have been destroyed as soon as it left my pocket).  But here is a neat picture of a huge thunderstorm/tornadoes(?) in State College a few years ago: 

Job!

Today I interviewed (for real, this time...all the other times were just pretend, apparently) for the job at Applied Research Lab here at Penn State.  That job would involve me doing lots of fun research on energy systems for mostly Navy-sponsored projects.  The interviews went GREAT, the people there all seemed really nice and liked their jobs, they said afterwards that I seemed like an excellent candidate and they were looking forward to the possibility of working with me.  So there's that.  I want it.  It seems like the most exciting job in the world right now.  They said I'd hear back from them next week. 

Also, I got my first ever real person job offer today for that job that I interviewed for in Maryland a little more than a month ago!  Ahhh!  They're offering me, like, real money, and health care, and vacation time, and stuff.  So weird.  It is not the most exciting job in the world (that distinction is still held by the job mentioned in the previous paragraph), but that means that SOMEBODY WANTS TO GIVE ME A JOB!  I'm wanted!  And this is a job that I got the old-fashioned way of going to the career fair, interviewing, and not ever having anybody I knew from the inside convince them that I'm a good worker and they should hire me.  Allllll me.  And Jesus, of course...I'm sure he helped out a bit ;-).   

So hopefully, by the end of next week, I will have 2 job prospects to work with.  So exciting!  And frightening.  But also exciting!  I really can't wait to be a "real person."  My friend Liz and I were talking about some people that she worked with that were "adults," and it was funny because technically we're adults too.  But we don't feel like it.  Maybe someday soon I'll feel like an adult.  I really just need to graduate. 

2 finals

I have 2 finals on Monday.  They are the last 2 finals I ever have to take.  Ever.  

I spent my whole day studying (sorta...I am easily distracted by my labmates, food, and the internet.  But I haven't left the lab in the past 9 hours with my studying books open!  That counts, right?).  It is Saturday.  After Monday, I will never again spend a Saturday studying for a final.  Or doing homework.  I hope.  

Even if I do, it won't be very many more Saturdays.  I could end up with one of those jobs that forces me to work on Saturdays, but I sure hope not.  And it won't be a regular occurrence. 

Tomorrow I have church and a women's night.  I really have grown to love these women at my church.  They're awesome, inspiring, and really great to have in my life.  But it will take away a very large chunk of my study time.  Can't wait for the day when I can spend quality time with those around me without feeling guilty for not studying instead.  

Goodbye, school.  I won't miss you.  But maybe I will.  My emotions are slightly conflicted about this whole being done with school thing.  But mostly just for the sake of saying goodbyes.  I've never been very good at that... And how do you say goodbye to something that's been a part of your life since you were 6?  

You spend your Saturdays doing things other than homework, that's how.  :-)  I'd like to think of it as a perpetual summer.  Yeah, let's go with that. 

Springtime!

Yesterday, as I stood in that football stadium and swayed back and forth with my classmates singing the Penn State alma mater, I remembered.  Because the last time I did just that, I was also crying profusely (and so was the rest of the audience, to be fair).  Last time there was hurt, pain, and confusion.  This time there was joy, hope, and healing.  Winter had turned to spring.  We came together as a family, once again...to celebrate the coming of spring, a new beginning, a brighter future.  

Except that it's supposed to snow tonight.  Whatever.  Yesterday we were outside in t-shirts. 

Also, last night I went to a concert given by the Penn State Glee Club.  Oh my.  60 men wearing tuxes singing beautiful music (often sacred hymns, and a few pirate songs).  Ahhhh.  :-) 

I go to the best school.  The crazy amount of talent here astounds me. 

And also, we have a new crop of baby duckies!

 

How is it spring where you are?  

Fighter jets, kittens, and other stories

This week I went to an on-site interview with Navair, the Navy's aircraft research and testing facility.  The interview was on a Navy base in southern Maryland.  Because it was at a Navy base, there were just lots of fighter jets just kind of chilling out and flying around for testing.  At one point when we were on a tour we saw a few F-18s take off and fly around, and during my interview (outside at a picnic table...really laid-back), we saw an F-35 take off (it was LOUD...we had to pause the interview for a minute so it could fly by).  Here's a fun youtube video of the F-35 that I got to see in person.  I felt like a kid in a candy store :-).  These planes are COOL. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=ZBt-aQ1vObM

On a completely different topic, Dave and I got to pet-sit a kitten last week.  The kitten was afraid of us for 2 full days and wouldn't ever come out when we were around, but finally on Friday it decided to befriend us.  It was so cute and cuddly, I got kitty snuggles for the whole weekend :-).  

Are you looking at me?

Kitty snuggles!

Being a natural predator... abut to attack Dave's finger

 Also, yesterday I got my passport! Yayy!!

Interview!

Tomorrow I am driving to Patuxant River, MD for a Wednesday interview.  Wish me luck!  It's going to be a 5 hour drive and I'm kind of bummed that I didn't take their offer for a rental car, but whatevs ... Betty can make it as long as I remember to fill her up with gas halfway there (my gas gauge is broken, makes for driving long distances an adventure).

I'm interviewing with Navair.  They do pretty cool looking stuff. 

And I get to skip class/work for 1 day and 2 half days!  Yayyys! 

Technical support

This morning, I spent 45 minutes on the phone with Comcast trying to get our cable to work again after they gave us a new digital converter box.  Long story short, I did not get our cable working (whatever...I don't really need TV anyway)...but I did speak to a lot of different technical support people, who apparently are not in contact with one another when they transfer me...AT ALL.  

I got a laugh when one of them (I believe it was technical support person #2 or #3) asked me for my address.  I told her, and then she said something along the lines of, "I can't find that address in our system.  Are you near any cities so I can transfer you to another technician in your area?"  Haha.  Clearly, she is not familiar with Pennsylvania geography, or with the location of State College.  I am about as far away from any cities as humanly possible, I think.  State College is, at best, a small town.  And at best, Pittsburgh is the closest city...about 2.5 hours away.  Maybe Harrisburg counts...it's a little closer at 2 hours. 

And I love it.  I love the small town feel.  I love being able to walk home from work on a beautiful day instead of taking the bus.  I love eating ice cream while gazing on a large cow pasture that provided the milk to make that ice cream.  With the mountains in the background, of course.  So beautiful.  I never would have guessed that I would have fallen so in love with State College, Pennsylvania. 

I have an interview in DC in 2 weeks, and the thought of being thrust into the big city scene of traffic and people slightly frightens me.  I will probably get lost trying to find my hotel, like I did in Hartford CT.  Oh well.  Cities are fun though, too.  I did enjoy visiting NYC and Cleveland and Philly and Pittsburgh the few times I have.  Heck, Erie is even kind of a city, and I loved it there.  Cities also provide lots of unique ministry opportunities that are harder to find in small towns.  But it's a high-stress, high-paced environment that I'm not quite ready for full-time.  In Erie, I could retreat to my little suburbs and avoid the inner city for weeks at a time.  And I can certainly do that if I end up in DC, too.  But it'd be harder.  And expensive.  And lots and lots of traffic.  Ugh.  

On the other hand, living completely in the middle of nowhere would also stress me out.  I like having neighbors, and stoplights, and things to do on the weekends. 

I think that's what I like so much about State College...it's a perfect balance of those things.  The college town atmosphere gives the town life and vibrancy and things to do.  But it's not a city packed with people (except on football weekends...at which times I avoid a 2-mile radius that surrounds the stadium at all costs).  

What do you like and dislike about cities?

Wonderful

ON FRIDAY, I BOOKED TICKETS TO GO TO COPENHAGEN FROM JUNE 9-17!!!!!!!

So. Excited.  I have never in my life been overseas.  I also had an appointment at the post office to get a passport on Monday (it will be here in 4-6 weeks...if all goes well).  Our airplane will be a 757 (!!).  I've never been on an airplane that big.  And I get to sit in an exit row for the red-eye 6 hour flight from NYC to Iceland.  Pumped.

This may require a bit of backstory:

My graduate research is in the field of gas turbines, and there's an International Gas Turbines Institute (IGTI) that holds a conference every summer.  They alternate in location between North America and Europe (last year was Vancouver..super cool).  This year it will be in Copenhagen.  While it's a no-brainer for certain students to go every year (PhD students, Master's students who want to work in the gas turbine industry after graduation, any students who wrote a paper that was submitted and who will have to give a presentation, etc.), it was not in any way a no-brainer for me to go (at least not with the department paying for my trip...I suppose I could have chosen to spend the ~$2000 myself to go for one week, but that's just expensive).  In fact, I fit into none of those 3 categories.  But the rest of my lab-mates do.  So for awhile, it looked like my entire lab was going to go to Copenhagen for a week without me and one other student.  I was sad.  My adviser told me all of the boring details I just told you, and then she said we'd talk about it again in a few weeks. 

But then, Friday, I saw my adviser at a women grad student luncheon.  Afterwards she asked me what we were doing about this conference.  I said I wanted to go.  And she, without any hesitation, said, "Okay, you can go."  Wait, what?  I didn't have to plead my case about why I should go?  I didn't have to commit to doing a PhD?  I giggled and thanked her and skipped back to the lab to book my flights.  I was lucky enough to get on the same flights that the rest of my labmates are taking, so I don't have to make the long trek alone.  We leave at 8:40pm June 9th, and arrive at 12:45pm the next day.  But that includes a time jump forward. It will be lots of traveling, but it might still be shorter than my terrible 20-hour excursion coming back home from New Orleans in March 2010 (I think we could have driven home faster than we flew that day...). 

Some fun facts about Copenhagen in June:

The sun rises at 4:30am and sets at 10:00pm

The average temperature is 66 degrees Fahrenheit (and record high is in the 80's...hah)

It. Looks. Like. This: 

Eeeep!  So excited!!!!! 

:-) :-) :-) 

Procrastinators unite...tomorrow

The second half of the semester is going to be rough for me, mostly because my motivation to do work has drastically decreased.  I can see the light at the end of the tunnel - 7 weeks and I am done with class...FOREVER.  Well, until somebody finally successfully convinces me to do a PhD.  They're trying really really hard.  

I have homework due this Friday.  It was assigned 2 weeks ago.  I have barely started it.  And right now, I am blogging about it instead of doing it. 

Oiy. 

Does anybody want to derive the finite volume equations in cylindrical coordinates for me?  Anybody? 

I want to ride my bicycle

And today, I did!  For the first time since probably October, when it started getting icky and cold.  Because today (and yesterday, and it's supposed to be until Saturday) it was BEAUTIFUL and in the 60's!  And since it's daylight savings time, it doesn't get dark until after 7, which means that I can get home before it gets dark.  I hate riding my bike in the dark, the little light I have doesn't illuminate the path very well at all and I feel like I'm going to run into a tree or get attacked by a bear on my way home.  I should just buy a new light, but really, it gives me an excuse to go home at a reasonable hour.  

It isn't quite as clean as this anymore.  And now the seat is at the proper height and I have lights!

I love my bike.  Best money I've ever spent.  I was nervous about spending so much money on it at first (usually my theory is to buy the cheapest thing possible, but I figured if I'd be putting it to good use then it would be best not to have it rust and fall apart after a few months), but it has more than paid for itself by saving me gas money and bus token money and parking money.  It shifts beautifully.  I can turn the shocks on and off, depending on whether or not I'm riding on the road or over a mountain path.  And there's no better way to wake up in the morning than by having wind whip past your face as you careen down a treacherous hill and weave in and out of people walking their dogs! 

I do need a bell.  I'm getting tired of yelling to people that I'm behind them.  

Now I want a road bike.  I think when I get a real job, I'll get one of those.  That's what I should have bought in the first place, but I wasn't sure what kind of terrain I'd be on (roads/through people's yards/mountain biking), so I went with the hybrid.  With a road bike I can go faster!  Less friction!

What's your favorite way to get to work in the morning?

A fun morning surprise

On Thursday morning, in the place where the regular bus picks me up, sat a much fancier looking, new bus!  It had a much quieter engine.  Instead of being a perfect square, the front was a little roundish.  I was intrigued.  I was even more excited when I got on the bus and the driver was raving about the half a million dollar bus he was got to drive.  It had a CD player, a better seat belt, and a smoother ride.  The best part: new bus smell!  It was a fun surprise that made my day a little better :-).  

source: http://onwardstate.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/01/normal_08energy.jpg